Books have always been a great source of entertainment. Reading a book can transport you to faraway worlds, full of magic, fantasy and anything that your imagination can conjure up. The only limit is your creativity.
Now, with social media, it’s been easier than ever to find new books to read, with everyone sharing the books they like online. One could say that reading has even become a trend on TikTok and Instagram with the community there being coined as BookTok.
BookTok sounds great, doesn’t it? Sharing stories online, meeting people who have the same opinions as you, and can recommend similar books. What’s not to love about BookTok? Well, we have a few gripes with it as a whole.
No community is perfect, and BookTok is no exception. While there are some flaws (and possibly bad apples) within the community, perhaps the most concerning is what BookTok is best known for: the romanticisation of their favourite dark romance stories.
What is dark romance?
This is a sub-genre of romance that’s been widely popularised by BookTok. As the name suggests, the themes in books like these are much darker than a usual romance book, usually having content that involves stalking, kidnapping, abuse or worse. The best example of dark romance we can think of is “Haunting Adeline” by H.D. Carlton. This book perfectly encapsulates the genre as a whole, with its gruesome, and frankly disturbing content.
This is where the problem begins. “Haunting Adeline” by no means, should be considered a romance at all, and the same goes for other books in this genre. Is beating your love interest into submission really something that should be considered romantic?
That’s right. Dark romance tends to involve abusive behaviours from the male lead. Oftentimes the female main character is coerced into a relationship, either by kidnapping or murdering her close ones. The thing is, on BookTok, this kind of behaviour is considered “hot”. Not only that, but there is the tendency to excuse cruel characters, just because they seem attractive. An argument that’s been floating around to excuse this, is “it’s just fiction, it’s not real”.
However, based on a study, the thing is, the media we consume does have an effect on reality. What we see can affect how we behave.
“I’ve become upsettingly comfortable with kidnapping.”
This is a quote from a Reddit thread, discussing the impacts of dark romance. The problem with excusing the actions of fictional men is that we slowly become desensitised to their horrible actions. This leads to thinking it’s normal. Then when does it actually happen in real life? It can be treated as no big deal and BookTok is great at using that excuse to justify the dark romances they read.
Other instances of dark romance
Let’s take a break from books, and look at where else we can find dark romance. Manhwa. The glorified abuse in these comics is just as bad as that in books. As it turns out, the readers of the manhwa community are similar to those on the side of BookTok. Romanticising this abuse.
Online is where the two communities differ. Where BookTok makes thirst traps, drooling over the male lead and inserting themselves into scenarios, the manhwa community favours “ship edits”. These are videos where two characters are paired together, as if they are the pinnacle of romance, rather than an abuser and a victim.
@ajunkyla Felix be like: gini banget jadi bayi yang harus melihat kebucinan mama dan papa☺️ #cryorbetteryetbeg #manhwa #matthiasvonherhardt #leylalewellin #webtoon #manhwafyp #naverwebtoon #manhwareccomendation #fyp #webtoonfyp #foryou #angst #webtoonindonesia #manhwaedit
♬ original sound – Leya 〽️
This looks like a sweet edit, of a mother and father. In reality, the main couple in this manhwa, very aptly titled “Cry or Better Yet, Beg”, suffer from the same abusive tropes, that all dark romance readers seem to enjoy so much. It’s all well and good to read dark romance, but one shouldn’t be romanticising the actions of an abuser.
Of course, that’s not to say you can’t read dark romance. Reading anything is fine, as long as you understand that this isn’t something that should happen in real life. Which is the main problem with BookTok. Instead of seeing that this is behaviour to stay away from, they gravitate toward it because it’s considered hot, and look for their own dark romances. What it really is, is an abusive relationship, and that’s dangerous.
Sources: Psychology Today, The British Psychological Society.
Janae Lee contributed to this article.
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